ffxv_kinkmeme | Prompt Post Round Six

Welcome to Round Six of the FFXV Kink Meme!

CLOSED for prompts | OPEN for fills

Please have a look at the extended rules here.

The important rules in short:

Post anonymously.
Negative comments on other people's prompts (kink-shaming, pairing-bashing etc.) and personal attacks of any kind will not be tolerated.
Don't be an asshole.
One prompt per comment. Warnings for common triggers and squicks are encouraged, but not required.
Prompts should follow the format: Character/character, prompt.
Keep prompts to a reasonable length; prompts should not be detailed story outlines.
Fills should have the word "Fill:" at the start of the subject line.
Otherwise please avoid changing the subject line.
No reposting of prompts from previous rounds, please.
No Meme-Police. Only ffxv_kinkbuddyffxv_kinkhelper ffxv_kinkbuddy and ffxv_kinkmod are allowed to mod the meme. If you spot a rules violation, don't comment in the thread, report it on the Ask a mod post.

Please direct any questions or report any problems to the Ask a mod post.

Prompt, write, draw, comment, and most importantly have fun!

(You can also check out our Pinboard for Filled or Unfilled prompts)

If you'd like to advertise a fill, head on over to the fills post! This is, of course, entirely optional.

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Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

From: (Anonymous)

"You thought your first kiss would be Lunafreya," the chancellor gloated as Noctis tried to spit the Gross Old Man taste out, "BUT IT WAS I, ARD--" Gladio's sword made a satisfyingly meaty THOCK as it severed Ardyn's head from his neck.

"Do you think we should have told him that that wasn't Noct's first kiss?" Prompto asked as arterial blood shot everywhere. Unperturbed by the spray, Ignis produced a bottle of mouthwash for the still-gagging prince.

"Prompto, we talked about this," Gladio groaned as the four walked away. "The first rule of Harem Club is--"

"Yeah, yeah, 'we don't talk about Harem Club.'"

From: (Anonymous)

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!

From: (Anonymous)

Oh my God, I need granny Ardyn in my life so bad now.

From: (Anonymous)

Everyone thinks Noctis, as the prince, is flaunting his power and influence by dating two hot blonds at the same time, one to be his sophisticated lady that hangs off his arms and has his babies and the other to be the commoner "concubine" that serves as the hot piece of ass Noctis can have whenever he wants. And the media definitely portrays them as such.

Which they find laughable because Noctis is so absolutely the opposite, to the point where he was too nervous to even ask them both out for fear of them thinking he was weird for being in love with both of them, and it took some collab on Luna and Prompto's parts to even get the relationship off the ground. Also both of them are treated equally both in Noct's inner circle and within the Citadel. And Luna's not a baby factory, nor is she planning on having kids any time soon. Also when she does, she'll happily have them with Prompto just as easily as she'll have them with Noctis. And Prompto was more experienced than Noct (and so was Luna) so if anyone was tapping anyone's "hot piece of ass" it was Prompto topping Noct. Also they are the sweetest little trio in existence and no, Noctis isn't some "hot blond collecting pimp" he respects both of them way too much to treat them like that. So yeah, the media's idea of their relationship is actually kind of hilarious.

From: (Anonymous)

Hmmm...would Ardyn grow a new head or would his head grow a new Ardyn?

From: (Anonymous)

Two thousand years is a LONG time. Sure, Ardyn was furious at the Lucii in the beginning, but after a couple of centuries he had a hard time holding a grudge against the distant descendants of the assholes who screwed him over. Then he was furious with the Astrals, but after ANOTHER couple of centuries, he realized that he would never be able to get proper revenge (without breaking the world, at least).

By the time the game starts, Ardyn is sick of immortality. He's seen everything and done everything, he's watched countless friends and loved ones pass away, and he is 100% done with everything. Unfortunately, he can only die when the Chosen King kills him, so he needs to bide his time until the guy finally gets around to being born. GROAN!

And then he takes a trip to Galdin Quay, and literally walks into the Chosen King when he leaves the restaurant.

+ Ardyn being creepily excited and insistent on Noctis killing him when they first meet.
+ He's willing to help the Chocobros overthrow the Niffs, so long as Noctis follows through on the prophecy.
+++ The prophecy says that the Oracle and the Chosen King will also die, but it doesn't specify a timeframe. Ardyn agrees to wait a few more decades so Noctis and Luna can both live full lives before quietly fulfilling the prophecy when they're old fogies.

From: (Anonymous)

This is everything I want in this OT3 I'm so happy this prompt exists.

From: (Anonymous)

Once they're far enough into their friendship that Noct is sure Prompto is there to stay, he gives him the "what to do if someone tries to kill us" talk. Only it's not quite what Prompto was expecting. Rule number 1: get to safety even if that means leaving Noct to die.

From: (Anonymous)

Basically Noct comes back after 10 years and Prompto doesn't show up with the other bros. Idk maybe he's assumed dead/missing/etc. They enter the throne room like in the game and Ardyn has Prompto dressed all pretty on his lap (while he has his way with him). And Noct and the bros react.

From: (Anonymous)

Handwavy reason as to why, but Gladio's hugs literally heal and, on top of that, are the best hugs to have ever been experienced.

His SO is ridiculously healthy because of this. He/She literally cannot catch even the sniffles. Gladio's family is just about on that same level, never get sick because they get so many hugs.

From: (Anonymous)

Noct is attacked or caught in the middle of civil unrest, whatever. Prompto is there with him, the only person there with him because Ignis or Gladio or wheoever get seperated from Noct.

Noct tells Prompto to gtfo of there, save himself, when things get especially dicey. Prompto of course says no way, and ends up dying protecti g his friend and prince (maybe catching a bullet to the chest or by covering Noct’s body with his own from debris, whatever).

Prompto is remembered as a hero of Insomnia for his bravery and service to the Crown.

From: (Anonymous)

Because of reasons, the Astrals cursed an immortal Ardyn to run a magical wish-granting shop (maybe because of more reasons, granting enough wishes will finally break his curse or weaken the scourge enough for him to die idk roll with it). Ardyn was bitter for a very long time but like half the wishes end up backfiring with painful results and it appeals to his sense of schadenfreude and dramatic irony so he's willing to stick with it.

And one day Prompto wanders into his shop and Ardyn is so amused and intrigued by this boy who has no requests for a man who can grant any wish that he decides to keep him around by giving him a job.

(Prompto thinks he's working for second-hand camera shop. Ardyn actually was selling a camera at a time. But the girl needed it to fight ghosts so she could prevent the hellmouth from opening, you know, as one does.)

From: (Anonymous)

Prompto has a bad habit of getting and staying in relationships with people who pretty much ignore him and dgaf, because he finds the rare occasions he earns their attention (mostly with sex or doing things for them) about all he really expects out of a relationship. Sometimes this goes all the way into abusive territory, sometimes it just stays in the "seriously you deserve better" territory, but all of it is firmly in the range of dump the motherfucker already.

It pisses Noctis (and later, Ignis and Gladio) off. Eventually he ends up in a relationship with any/all of them and is kind of stunned and in awe of how much better it can be.

From: (Anonymous)

I'm pretty sure that wanting to finally die is Ardyn's main goal even in canon, he just has a secondary goal of also fucking over everyone else as much as he can on the way out.

But an AU where he decided to stick with only his main goal and skip the rest of it would be interesting.

From: (Anonymous)

Well, sure. What else would you even use a camera for, right?

From: (Anonymous)

YES. Someone please write this, it could be so good.

(The worst thing is that when Ardyn drops by to deliver terrifying, inhuman messages of doom, it's hard to tell whether that's Ifrit talking or just Ardyn being Ardyn.)

From: (Anonymous)

Yeah, Ignis! Stand up for your buddy! This is beautiful.

From: (Anonymous)

So in Lucis what is considered typically beautiful/handsome in society (and regular) is porceline pale skin and dark hair, like what Noctis has. I want to see how different this could be in Niflheim since the people there are much fairer.

I just want to see Prompto getting a little flustered by how much attention he seems to be attracting when they get to Altissia. He has pretty blond hair and cute freckles and people find him stunning. Both guys and girls are checking him out and hitting on him. He's just not used to this response since people didn't exactly find him desirable in Insomnia.

++++++ Bros reactions

I just think this could be really sweet.

From: (Anonymous)

Ardyn learns to knit at some point in his thousands years of existence and that guy who gives all of his friends and family ugly sweaters and scarves each year. And yes, by family I do mean the Royal Family of Lucis who recive mysterious packages contains the most colorblind knitwear ever.

From: (Anonymous)

The guys have sworn to die for Noctis because as the chosen one his life is more important than theirs. I want to see a scenario where the worst comes to pass and Noctis has to knowingly, intentionally leave one or more bros to their deaths so he can save himself.

Basically make me cry about Noctis having to make an impossible choice and choosing the future of Eos as he has always been meant to do, no matter how much it hurts.

bonus: the bro(s) he left behind survive after all and are proud of him for leaving them, bc I love a happy ending haha

From: (Anonymous)

Ugh that title is a mess haha

I mean, instead of Gladio/Ignis/Noct/Prompto, everyone is just with NOCT. And they’re aware of this and accepting of it and it’s good.

Um... plot up to you?

From: (Anonymous)

yes yes yes, this is my favorite ot4 poly dynamic. would this be them only having 1:1 sex? or would they still have group sex but focused on Noct?

From: (Anonymous)

OP - I was thinking 1:1 sex, since they're not really into each other in this scenario

From: (Anonymous)

OP - Erm... that made it sound like Noct/whoever isn't into each other, oops. That should say Ignis, Gladio and Prompto are not into each other in this scenario haha.

From: (Anonymous)

I'm thinking along the lines of the Kogi BBQ Taco Truck. Like, he uses social media cleverly to build up hype/a following (like, always parking in a different location and tweeting out where he's gonna be for a certain amount of time). Maybe he never has the same thing on the menu twice. idk. Just, Ignis living his best life travelling around making food all day.

(Optional: Ignis is still blind in this AU and he has someone along with him as a helper/driver)

*also, a note on the AU aspect: I'm not a fan of modern AUs, so I'd love it if it could still take place in canon Lucis. Maybe there's just no prophecy, or he never became Noct's advisor, or this is a side job, etc etc.